Time is a vehicle, always moving on
Not one that we can drive or even control, or guide,
But we do have choices in how to spend it.
Others can steal it from us by controlling our thoughts
Causing us to waste our time with worry
Or sinful thoughts of hate, revenge, or jealousy and envy.
Time will spent in productive unselfish endeavors is a blessing
To others as well as ourselves.
We have to listen for guidance from the Lord
As to how to spend this valuable commodity,
Time is there to be owned
We can use it to paint memories with
Or we can ignore it's passing
If we let it pass, it's gone forever
But better that, than to paint ugly memories
A little time spent wisely,
Can reap rewards for a lifetime
Time spent sowing seeds of compassion
Will bring a time of beauty and peace
Pray for patience and understanding,
Seek the wisdom of God, and the peace
Beyond comprehension will be yours
Php 4:7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
What about time that is spent
On fixing something that won't work
or is broken
On something that is unnecessary
Like a hobby, fishing, or reading
On something that is generous
On something that is educational
What about time searching for truth
And seeking the Kingdom of God
Time spent in meditation, contemplation,
And pondering over The Holy Scripture's message
In todays' world
One such message from the teaching of Jesus
Is that to worry about tomorrow
Is a waste of time
Mt 6:34 KJV, Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself.
Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.
A feeling of satisfaction goes with the use of a period of time, be it small or large, doing something productive and positive. This is another example of The Spirit of God at work in our psyche.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Monday, August 31, 2009
Understandings
An “Understanding” is a time when a “light bulb” comes on as the Lord and I communicate during the course of events on a normal day
Order, everything is in order, everything. Mankind may not recognize some of the design, but it is there. There has to be a purpose for this order, a need that has to be fulfilled. Mankind should not pretend to understand or comprehend all things about this order of creation or dismiss the fact or truth of the knowledge that is unveiled according to the Divine schedule of our Lord and Creator.
It is so gratifying to come to an “Understanding” that seems to be from the Holy Spirit. Now I am sure that some would debate this, but it is only important to "Me" if I feel the presence of God as I go about my life.
This one particular time happened as I was picking strawberries in my little raised bed improvised in an old tractor tire. I was so proud of myself because it seemed like my idea had worked. Some time ago, maybe two years, I had cut the side walls off two old tractor tires that a farmer friend had given me because they were of no use to him anymore. I had filled them with soil and was gardening in them as raised beds.
When even my wife admitted that it was working, my imagination was in high gear.
I imagined ten old tractor tires and a pay to pick sign out by the road, maybe even fifty old tractor tires.
Then my thoughts went to how can I keep the birds from getting my precious strawberries, I thought of the words that they hadn't planted these berries why should they be in on the harvest. Then I thought of this Scripture!
Consider the ravens: for they neither sow nor reap; which neither have storehouse nor barn; and God feedeth them: how much more are ye better than the fowls? Lu 12:24
Then I remembered how I had come to an understanding on another day after watching birds go about their appointed task of defending their territories, finding mates, food, nesting, and so on. This was another time of understanding of how God's creation has such wonderful order, and how we all have a purpose to fulfill.
Who am I to deny the opportunity for these birds to be fed by God. They probably also feed on insects and weed seed at the same time anyway, so we are kind of sharecroppers.
Work is the pathway to peace of mind, all living things are created with certain abilities to perform tasks for the continuation of creation. If our minds and bodies are occupied in a productive pursuit of some kind, whether it be an actual product, or the completion of a project of spirit and thought, the ending result should be satisfaction or peace of mind.
Many of us may never find this path to peace of mind and satisfaction, but we should be in constant prayer to be led by The Lord God to our predestined position in the work force of God The Father Almighty.
One has only to watch the natural train of events in nature as the seasons display the orderly march of events as all of life moves toward reproduction and completion. The birds of the field as they search diligently for mate, food, and prepare to reproduce, the insects and creatures with fur and fin on much the same mission., flowers of the field, spots of moss, and over powering trees, nary a one without a purpose dictated by the creator.
What joy and happiness awaits the man or woman who realizes and recognizes their potential and ability to do the work assigned. If only we could grow to the point of finding our reward need not be wealth nor power, but peace of mind in knowing that we have helped our Creator.
One thing that may well prevent us from finding this occupation or alloted space of employment, may be competition. Not that there won't be any room left for us, but that we won't feel that we can compete well enough to have any success. Competition has been the brake applied to many attempts toward a life of satisfactory achievement. It is not our competitors who apply the brake but we ourselves because we cannot bring ourselves to the point of risk. It would be better that we do the best we can with the abilities that God has given us than to let the work go undone.
Order, everything is in order, everything. Mankind may not recognize some of the design, but it is there. There has to be a purpose for this order, a need that has to be fulfilled. Mankind should not pretend to understand or comprehend all things about this order of creation or dismiss the fact or truth of the knowledge that is unveiled according to the Divine schedule of our Lord and Creator.
It is so gratifying to come to an “Understanding” that seems to be from the Holy Spirit. Now I am sure that some would debate this, but it is only important to "Me" if I feel the presence of God as I go about my life.
This one particular time happened as I was picking strawberries in my little raised bed improvised in an old tractor tire. I was so proud of myself because it seemed like my idea had worked. Some time ago, maybe two years, I had cut the side walls off two old tractor tires that a farmer friend had given me because they were of no use to him anymore. I had filled them with soil and was gardening in them as raised beds.
When even my wife admitted that it was working, my imagination was in high gear.
I imagined ten old tractor tires and a pay to pick sign out by the road, maybe even fifty old tractor tires.
Then my thoughts went to how can I keep the birds from getting my precious strawberries, I thought of the words that they hadn't planted these berries why should they be in on the harvest. Then I thought of this Scripture!
Consider the ravens: for they neither sow nor reap; which neither have storehouse nor barn; and God feedeth them: how much more are ye better than the fowls? Lu 12:24
Then I remembered how I had come to an understanding on another day after watching birds go about their appointed task of defending their territories, finding mates, food, nesting, and so on. This was another time of understanding of how God's creation has such wonderful order, and how we all have a purpose to fulfill.
Who am I to deny the opportunity for these birds to be fed by God. They probably also feed on insects and weed seed at the same time anyway, so we are kind of sharecroppers.
Work is the pathway to peace of mind, all living things are created with certain abilities to perform tasks for the continuation of creation. If our minds and bodies are occupied in a productive pursuit of some kind, whether it be an actual product, or the completion of a project of spirit and thought, the ending result should be satisfaction or peace of mind.
Many of us may never find this path to peace of mind and satisfaction, but we should be in constant prayer to be led by The Lord God to our predestined position in the work force of God The Father Almighty.
One has only to watch the natural train of events in nature as the seasons display the orderly march of events as all of life moves toward reproduction and completion. The birds of the field as they search diligently for mate, food, and prepare to reproduce, the insects and creatures with fur and fin on much the same mission., flowers of the field, spots of moss, and over powering trees, nary a one without a purpose dictated by the creator.
What joy and happiness awaits the man or woman who realizes and recognizes their potential and ability to do the work assigned. If only we could grow to the point of finding our reward need not be wealth nor power, but peace of mind in knowing that we have helped our Creator.
One thing that may well prevent us from finding this occupation or alloted space of employment, may be competition. Not that there won't be any room left for us, but that we won't feel that we can compete well enough to have any success. Competition has been the brake applied to many attempts toward a life of satisfactory achievement. It is not our competitors who apply the brake but we ourselves because we cannot bring ourselves to the point of risk. It would be better that we do the best we can with the abilities that God has given us than to let the work go undone.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Patience
Patience is not the easiest virtue to attain or master, maybe even the most difficult. To make our psyche wait for something, even if it be from Our Heavenly Father, is a frustrating challenge. If we are in search of the peace and joy of the relationship with the Holy Spirit then we must learn to wait for our life to unfold as He would have it.
Mt 6:8 ( for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.)
This is where the rubber meets the road in our journey and life time relationship with our creator. Patience and faith must be part of our game strategy as we live out our share of the time that we are allotted on this earth. I believe that my life has gone according to a Divine plan, not a plan that rewarded me as a deserving servant of God, rather a plan that could turn sour if there was not a resonance with a general direction that was true to an instilled knowledge.
Waiting for our life to unfold I don't think is supposed to be a time of idleness, rather a time of seeking and being aware of opportunities to serve in what ever capacities become available. We must take ownership of our life and live according to the direction that we feel drawn by the Lord. This would obviously be an unselfish direction in which we would be making our world in tune with our belief and the Truth as unveiled to us by the Holy Spirit.
Ga 6:9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.
Lu 9:62 And Jesus said unto him, No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.
This verse has always bothered me, seeming to be a harsh thing for my Jesus to be saying, but it gets even more bothersome if we try to take the tiller from the Lord and steer our own course.
Mt 10:37 He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.
Lu 14:26 If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.
We must continue on once we have put our hand on the plow. Growing old is especially a time when impatience can be a stumbling block. We must persevere as best we can, remembering that we can do all things through Him who strengthens us.
Ec. 7:8 Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.
Perseverance might be a better title for this article because that is the discipline necessary to be patient. To me it is obvious that I will never be fit for the Kingdom of God no matter what I attempt to do, I can only accept the wonderful gifts of God, and live one day at a time trying to serve as best I can with the understanding which will come if I patiently persevere along the path of my journey.
Eph 2:8 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God.
Eph 2:9 Not of works, lest any man should boast
Eph 2:10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.
I do want to say that I also love the statement in the Book of James about Faith and Works being together
Jas 2:17 Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone.
Jas 2:18 Yea, a man may say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: shew me thy faith without thy works, and I will shew thee my faith by my works.
Life is good!
Mt 6:8 ( for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.)
This is where the rubber meets the road in our journey and life time relationship with our creator. Patience and faith must be part of our game strategy as we live out our share of the time that we are allotted on this earth. I believe that my life has gone according to a Divine plan, not a plan that rewarded me as a deserving servant of God, rather a plan that could turn sour if there was not a resonance with a general direction that was true to an instilled knowledge.
Waiting for our life to unfold I don't think is supposed to be a time of idleness, rather a time of seeking and being aware of opportunities to serve in what ever capacities become available. We must take ownership of our life and live according to the direction that we feel drawn by the Lord. This would obviously be an unselfish direction in which we would be making our world in tune with our belief and the Truth as unveiled to us by the Holy Spirit.
Ga 6:9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.
Lu 9:62 And Jesus said unto him, No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.
This verse has always bothered me, seeming to be a harsh thing for my Jesus to be saying, but it gets even more bothersome if we try to take the tiller from the Lord and steer our own course.
Mt 10:37 He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.
Lu 14:26 If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.
We must continue on once we have put our hand on the plow. Growing old is especially a time when impatience can be a stumbling block. We must persevere as best we can, remembering that we can do all things through Him who strengthens us.
Ec. 7:8 Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.
Perseverance might be a better title for this article because that is the discipline necessary to be patient. To me it is obvious that I will never be fit for the Kingdom of God no matter what I attempt to do, I can only accept the wonderful gifts of God, and live one day at a time trying to serve as best I can with the understanding which will come if I patiently persevere along the path of my journey.
Eph 2:8 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God.
Eph 2:9 Not of works, lest any man should boast
Eph 2:10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.
I do want to say that I also love the statement in the Book of James about Faith and Works being together
Jas 2:17 Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone.
Jas 2:18 Yea, a man may say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: shew me thy faith without thy works, and I will shew thee my faith by my works.
Life is good!
Friday, February 27, 2009
Wisdom
Knowledge is something that you can pursue and attain, wisdom is not something that you have after a pursuit, or study. It is something that you acquire as you travel through life. Older folks are supposed to have it, but I don't think that this is always the case. It appears to me that if you have not ventured out in life and taken risks then you probably have missed the experiences of failure and success that teaches wisdom. Jesus taught about taking risks, when he told the parable about the servant that buried his masters property instead of investing it.. Wisdom would pertain to values and priorities as you live your life. I suppose wisdom might be the sum of the other virtues as they add up in your life, it seems to me that humbleness travels with wisdom. You can never be done growing in wisdom. As I turn to write on the virtue of wisdom I find it very elusive. It is almost like the harder I try to put my finger on what is true wisdom, the more it evades my grasp. In the book of James we are told that all we have to do is ask for wisdom and it shall be given. ..
Jas 1:5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
This statement in the book of James might be taken with a word of caution as some say "Be careful what you pray for!" This gift of Wisdom may be encapsuled in a life changing experience.
One of my Sunday School memories is how King Solomon could have had any gift from God and instead of asking for riches he asked for wisdom..
.
1Ki 3:9 Give therefore thy servant an understanding heart to judge thy people, that I may discern between good and bad: for who is able to judge this thy so great a people
1Ki 3:12 Behold, I have done according to thy words: lo, I have given thee a wise and an understanding heart; so that there was none like thee before thee, neither after thee shall any arise like unto thee.
1Ki 3:13 And I have also given thee that which thou hast not asked, both riches, and honour: so that there shall not be any among the kings like unto thee all thy days
So maybe I am making my quest to find wisdom too complicated, maybe seeking the kingdom of God will bring me to wisdom. I don't mean to the extent of King Solomon, I mean just enough to stay out of trouble.
In the book of Psalms it is pretty clear that to have a hallowed awe inspired respect for God is the beginning of wisdom.
Ps 111:10 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: a good understanding have all they that do his commandments: his praise endureth for ever.
Evidently empathy and understanding must go along with humbleness in having a common tie to wisdom.
I believe that Solomon was coming to a point of understanding as he wrote the last few words of the book of Ecclesiastes.
Ec 12:13 ¶ Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.
Jas 1:5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
This statement in the book of James might be taken with a word of caution as some say "Be careful what you pray for!" This gift of Wisdom may be encapsuled in a life changing experience.
One of my Sunday School memories is how King Solomon could have had any gift from God and instead of asking for riches he asked for wisdom..
.
1Ki 3:9 Give therefore thy servant an understanding heart to judge thy people, that I may discern between good and bad: for who is able to judge this thy so great a people
1Ki 3:12 Behold, I have done according to thy words: lo, I have given thee a wise and an understanding heart; so that there was none like thee before thee, neither after thee shall any arise like unto thee.
1Ki 3:13 And I have also given thee that which thou hast not asked, both riches, and honour: so that there shall not be any among the kings like unto thee all thy days
So maybe I am making my quest to find wisdom too complicated, maybe seeking the kingdom of God will bring me to wisdom. I don't mean to the extent of King Solomon, I mean just enough to stay out of trouble.
In the book of Psalms it is pretty clear that to have a hallowed awe inspired respect for God is the beginning of wisdom.
Ps 111:10 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: a good understanding have all they that do his commandments: his praise endureth for ever.
Evidently empathy and understanding must go along with humbleness in having a common tie to wisdom.
I believe that Solomon was coming to a point of understanding as he wrote the last few words of the book of Ecclesiastes.
Ec 12:13 ¶ Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Humility
Pride is a wonderful thing when it is a feeling brought on by an act of God, such as the pride felt by the new parent as they admire their newborn with a feeling of wonder and awe. As they worship the Lord in their thoughts as they view the tiny hands and features of the new person that has been created through them. This sense of pride will be relived many times as they watch their child grow and achieve, this sense of pride will be accompanied with a humbleness as it realized that it is all a gift given by the Grace of God.This is a pride of humility, not of arrogance, such as referred to in the book of Proverbs!
Pr 8:13 The fear of Jehovah is to hate evil: Pride, and arrogancy, and the evil way, And the perverse mouth, do I hate.
Pr 11:2 When pride cometh, then cometh shame; But with the lowly is wisdom.
Pr 13:10 By pride cometh only contention; But with the well-advised is wisdom.
Pr 14:3 In the mouth of the foolish is a rod for his pride; But the lips of the wise shall preserve them.
Pr 16:18 Pride goeth before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.
Pr 21:24 The proud and haughty man, scoffer is his name; He worketh in the arrogance of pride.
Pr 29:23 A man's pride shall bring him low; But he that is of a lowly spirit shall obtain honor.
(ASV)
So here is another simple rule of living, arrogant pride that we use to elevate ourselves to a higher position than our fellow men is sinful and will separate us from God.
Jesus referred to this problem of pride, during teaching in the fourteenth chapter of Luke,
Lu 14:11 For everyone that exalteth himself shall be humbled; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.
Jesus said in Mt 23:11 But he that is greatest among you shall be your servant.
Mr 9:35 And he sat down, and called the twelve; and he saith unto them, If any man would be first, he shall be last of all, and servant of all.
Mt 18:4 Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
The call to humbleness is all through the bible, another good example is in the fourth chapter of James,
Jas 4:10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall exalt you.
Jas 4:13 Come now, ye that say, To-day or to-morrow we will go into this city, and spend a year there, and trade, and get gain:
Jas 4:14 whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. What is your life? For ye are a vapor, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.
Jas 4:15 For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall both live, and do this or that.
I believe that the wisdom of proper living is that if we don't learn to live with an attitude of humbleness, we will be humbled!
Pr 8:13 The fear of Jehovah is to hate evil: Pride, and arrogancy, and the evil way, And the perverse mouth, do I hate.
Pr 11:2 When pride cometh, then cometh shame; But with the lowly is wisdom.
Pr 13:10 By pride cometh only contention; But with the well-advised is wisdom.
Pr 14:3 In the mouth of the foolish is a rod for his pride; But the lips of the wise shall preserve them.
Pr 16:18 Pride goeth before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.
Pr 21:24 The proud and haughty man, scoffer is his name; He worketh in the arrogance of pride.
Pr 29:23 A man's pride shall bring him low; But he that is of a lowly spirit shall obtain honor.
(ASV)
So here is another simple rule of living, arrogant pride that we use to elevate ourselves to a higher position than our fellow men is sinful and will separate us from God.
Jesus referred to this problem of pride, during teaching in the fourteenth chapter of Luke,
Lu 14:11 For everyone that exalteth himself shall be humbled; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.
Jesus said in Mt 23:11 But he that is greatest among you shall be your servant.
Mr 9:35 And he sat down, and called the twelve; and he saith unto them, If any man would be first, he shall be last of all, and servant of all.
Mt 18:4 Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
The call to humbleness is all through the bible, another good example is in the fourth chapter of James,
Jas 4:10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall exalt you.
Jas 4:13 Come now, ye that say, To-day or to-morrow we will go into this city, and spend a year there, and trade, and get gain:
Jas 4:14 whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. What is your life? For ye are a vapor, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.
Jas 4:15 For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall both live, and do this or that.
I believe that the wisdom of proper living is that if we don't learn to live with an attitude of humbleness, we will be humbled!
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Attitude
I pray often to have the right values, priorities, attitudes, patience, understanding, wisdom, compassion, unselfishness, humbleness, and empathy. I know that I have had shortcomings in all of these virtues and I know that satisfaction, happiness, and peace of mind all keep company in this neighborhood of thought.
To find the path to this neighborhood of thought we must first employ the right attitude. We need to find a vehicle to move us through every avenue of experience and avoid temptation to detour to the negative side of thought.
Abraham Lincoln in his wisdom is credited with this quotation "Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."
There is no switch to just flip on for the joy of a good attitude, if we are suffering from depression it is more important and yet harder to attain a positive attitude.
However we will have an attitude of some value whether it be positive or negative during every wakened minute of our existence, for this we can be assured. I can only speak to this from my own life history, but I know that if I find myself in conflicting thoughts about my current life situation at any particular time, I will soon begin beating my self up over decisions, and actions that haunt me from my past. My cure for this swing to negativity and depressed feelings is to count my blessings and recite or read positive scripture or devotional material, such as "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13, "If God be for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31.
We have to be on guard at all times and not dwell on ourselves but find needs in our surroundings that we can attend to according to our own limitations. It does not have to be a large commitment just as long as it is something to get our minds off our own worries. Once we have found a vehicle to move us into an area of helping others no matter how limited it may be, we can begin to explore ways to build our confidence and ability to cope with every day problems of life.
We need to find a purpose to busy ourselves with that will make a positive difference in the world, as we know it. If we do this in the Name of God it can be like a mustard seed, or the leaven in the bread dough, and grow within us as we seek peace of mind, and the Kingdom of God.
Our goal will be to improve our attitude to the point that we can go to bed at night satisfied with our day enough to let us give thanks to the Lord for having lived it, and to wake in the morning with enough gumption to ask the Lord for another good day, and to expect it.
Php 4:7 "And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus."
To find the path to this neighborhood of thought we must first employ the right attitude. We need to find a vehicle to move us through every avenue of experience and avoid temptation to detour to the negative side of thought.
Abraham Lincoln in his wisdom is credited with this quotation "Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."
There is no switch to just flip on for the joy of a good attitude, if we are suffering from depression it is more important and yet harder to attain a positive attitude.
However we will have an attitude of some value whether it be positive or negative during every wakened minute of our existence, for this we can be assured. I can only speak to this from my own life history, but I know that if I find myself in conflicting thoughts about my current life situation at any particular time, I will soon begin beating my self up over decisions, and actions that haunt me from my past. My cure for this swing to negativity and depressed feelings is to count my blessings and recite or read positive scripture or devotional material, such as "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13, "If God be for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31.
We have to be on guard at all times and not dwell on ourselves but find needs in our surroundings that we can attend to according to our own limitations. It does not have to be a large commitment just as long as it is something to get our minds off our own worries. Once we have found a vehicle to move us into an area of helping others no matter how limited it may be, we can begin to explore ways to build our confidence and ability to cope with every day problems of life.
We need to find a purpose to busy ourselves with that will make a positive difference in the world, as we know it. If we do this in the Name of God it can be like a mustard seed, or the leaven in the bread dough, and grow within us as we seek peace of mind, and the Kingdom of God.
Our goal will be to improve our attitude to the point that we can go to bed at night satisfied with our day enough to let us give thanks to the Lord for having lived it, and to wake in the morning with enough gumption to ask the Lord for another good day, and to expect it.
Php 4:7 "And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus."
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Depression is not logical
I remember sitting there in the passenger seat, crying my eyes out while my wife drove us home from church. A grown man, four wonderful children, great wife, good job, and apparently healthy. I was emotionally drained, no appetite, no desire for any thing. I remember that whenever I would drive past a graveyard I would think how lucky the people buried in there were. Their worries were over, they had no burdens, no worries, and they were not going through what I was. Self pity to the extreme. My doctor had changed my medication after a short time on two different antidepressants, he had taken one completely away and I had gone back into serious depression in just a matter of days or maybe even hours. It was so long ago that I don't remember any thing too precise, except some of the misery. When we called and told the doctor this, he felt bad about putting me through more of what he had been trying to cure. He immediately put me back on the drug, and more time off work which gave me something more to worry about. Now this was a legitimate thing to worry about, being off work meant no income and our small savings was disappearing fast. Then my well meaning parents or others would say something negative about our situation and this would just crush me emotionally.
So it came down to if I could get my emotions under control I could work and make a living, but if the environment that I was creating was unbearable, then things just got worse. The whole point that I am trying to make here is that there is no obvious reason that a person can give for feeling the way they do, when they are suffering from depression.
At this time I really needed support. My family had patience, and was there for me, but did not understand my feelings any better than I did.
I think that this was probably about the time that I started reading the Plus devotional magazine that Norman Vincent Peale was publishing. It had stories of people overcoming emotional obstacles and positive scripture on every page. I followed Dr. Peale’s suggestions about confidence building and slowly gained ground. One time when Dr. Peale was in town speaking at a motivational seminar, I laid off work and bought tickets to go. I don't recall hearing of support groups, or seeing ads about the threat of depression. I think that I was ahead of the curve on treatment available and wide understanding of my problem. I am just lucky that I wasn't so far back in time that I was subjected to being locked up or undergoing shock treatment. Reading Dr. Peale’s material was my support group, and the scripture and prayer my therapy.
In the King James version of the Bible, book of Ephesians, chapter 6, verse 11, Paul writes to "Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil." I think that we need this armour to deal with the difficulties of life too. It could also be looked on as a tool kit. In this tool kit would be having proper values, proper priorities, positive attitude, patience, understanding, wisdom, compassion, unselfishness, humbleness, and empathy.
So whether we have armour for protection, or tools for repair and building back our damaged character and self-esteem, this is what we must strive to find and hold onto like a life ring in the ocean. I was guided to positive scripture like "Lu 11:9 And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.", " Mt 11:30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.", "Mt 11:28 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.", "Phil 4:7 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.", and "Ro 8:31 What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?" For many years keeping scripture like this in my memory in easy reach to use when needed has been my salvation.
Years later I had been told that the medicine I was on might cause heart trouble so I asked my doctor, (who was a different doctor by this time and new to me and had been writing my prescriptions based on my medical history), to consider taking me off these meds. He wanted nothing to do with taking them away from me. He said that treating depression with these types of medication was so new, that it was not understood and if the medicine was working I should leave well enough alone. This would have been in the late nineteen eighties, ten to twelve years after my start into depression. A few months later another doctor referred me to a Psychiatrist who weaned me off the medicine a small fraction at a time. It seems that if you come off all at once it messes up your body chemistry as I suggested earlier in my writing.
So this is my story that is not over yet, as I still cope with the difficulties of life wearing the armour of God, and using my tool kit.
So it came down to if I could get my emotions under control I could work and make a living, but if the environment that I was creating was unbearable, then things just got worse. The whole point that I am trying to make here is that there is no obvious reason that a person can give for feeling the way they do, when they are suffering from depression.
At this time I really needed support. My family had patience, and was there for me, but did not understand my feelings any better than I did.
I think that this was probably about the time that I started reading the Plus devotional magazine that Norman Vincent Peale was publishing. It had stories of people overcoming emotional obstacles and positive scripture on every page. I followed Dr. Peale’s suggestions about confidence building and slowly gained ground. One time when Dr. Peale was in town speaking at a motivational seminar, I laid off work and bought tickets to go. I don't recall hearing of support groups, or seeing ads about the threat of depression. I think that I was ahead of the curve on treatment available and wide understanding of my problem. I am just lucky that I wasn't so far back in time that I was subjected to being locked up or undergoing shock treatment. Reading Dr. Peale’s material was my support group, and the scripture and prayer my therapy.
In the King James version of the Bible, book of Ephesians, chapter 6, verse 11, Paul writes to "Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil." I think that we need this armour to deal with the difficulties of life too. It could also be looked on as a tool kit. In this tool kit would be having proper values, proper priorities, positive attitude, patience, understanding, wisdom, compassion, unselfishness, humbleness, and empathy.
So whether we have armour for protection, or tools for repair and building back our damaged character and self-esteem, this is what we must strive to find and hold onto like a life ring in the ocean. I was guided to positive scripture like "Lu 11:9 And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.", " Mt 11:30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.", "Mt 11:28 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.", "Phil 4:7 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.", and "Ro 8:31 What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?" For many years keeping scripture like this in my memory in easy reach to use when needed has been my salvation.
Years later I had been told that the medicine I was on might cause heart trouble so I asked my doctor, (who was a different doctor by this time and new to me and had been writing my prescriptions based on my medical history), to consider taking me off these meds. He wanted nothing to do with taking them away from me. He said that treating depression with these types of medication was so new, that it was not understood and if the medicine was working I should leave well enough alone. This would have been in the late nineteen eighties, ten to twelve years after my start into depression. A few months later another doctor referred me to a Psychiatrist who weaned me off the medicine a small fraction at a time. It seems that if you come off all at once it messes up your body chemistry as I suggested earlier in my writing.
So this is my story that is not over yet, as I still cope with the difficulties of life wearing the armour of God, and using my tool kit.
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